Tuesday, June 08, 2004
Chris Wins Lottery!
In an amazing turn of events Chris has found himself the holder of a winning lottery ticket worth $23.5 million dollars. When asked how his new riches might change him, Chris responded a bit curtly, "F**k off bitch, I don't need you anymore. I don't need anyone. I'm gonna get me some people and then those people are gonna get me a starlet or a supermodel or something!"
When asked about his current wife and small child, Chris was direct with his answer. "Who? Hello! I've got $23.5 million dollars... I don't need no wife or baby to hold me back. I've been living this destitute life long enough... do you realize that my cell phone doesn't even have a color screen... jesus, my satellite dish and television aren't even HD ready. I am done with that sh*t!"
Chris expects to receive the big fake check Thursday and hope to cash it on Friday. He plans to be in the Swiss Alps this weekend with a yet to be determined new girlfriend.
When asked about his current wife and small child, Chris was direct with his answer. "Who? Hello! I've got $23.5 million dollars... I don't need no wife or baby to hold me back. I've been living this destitute life long enough... do you realize that my cell phone doesn't even have a color screen... jesus, my satellite dish and television aren't even HD ready. I am done with that sh*t!"
Chris expects to receive the big fake check Thursday and hope to cash it on Friday. He plans to be in the Swiss Alps this weekend with a yet to be determined new girlfriend.
