Monday, April 12, 2004
Answering Your Questions...
Dear Chris Magazine,
Recently I was watching a popular cable show and heard a term that sparked my interest. I was wondering if you and your staff could explain the term "It's on!", as in " Alright bitch! You done it, now IT's ON". I'm not quite sure what "It" is or when "it's" "on". Could you please help, I don't want to make a fool out of myself when talking to the ladies.
Thanks -your loyal reader
Dear Your Loyal Reader,
This is an incredibly complex question, one that has literally been asked for centuries. The first recorded instance of "it" being "o"n was around 146 B.C.. Carthage and Rome had been battling for control of part of Sicily and later much of Northern Africa. After the first two Punic Wars, the second of which was almost won by Carthage General Hannibal, the Romans were so incensed that this little African city-state was still standing that the current Roman leader exclaimed to his generals... "Dammit, this sh*t is on!" The Romans proceeded to lay Carthage to the ground in the third and final Punic War.
Clearly in that instance, the term "it" was a part of a greater word "sh*t". The term itself has come to mean the moment at which a particular event has reached its peak or point of no return. Other famous examples are in 1218 when the Uzbeks of Central Asia sent Genghis Khan a letter insinuating that his conquest of China was a pansy-ass move. According to The Secret History of the Mongols, he responded by saying, "Uzbeks my ass, it's on!" He then proceeded to sweep across Central Asia and into the Middle East and Russia, establishing one of the largest empires the world has ever seen.
A more recent example of the term being used was during the American Revolution. John Paul Jones, the famous American captain was on his ship, the Bonhomme Richard and engaged the superior English vessel Serapis. The Richard was badly damaged and the English captain asked Jones if he was ready to give up to which Jones replied, "Bite me bitch, now it's on!" The Americans rallied around those words, the English later surrendered and Jones took the Serapis.
As to the second part of your question, when is "it" "on". The truth is that varies quite a bit depending on the situation. It is always that peak or point of no return, but determining exactly when that moment is takes a skilled expert. I would advise not declaring anything to be "on" unless you are 100% sure that is the case. Here's an example of what could happen if you misjudge is situation.
Jack Watson was waiting in line at a concession stand at a professional basketball game. Four times the person in back of him bumped into him, each time the person apologized and then did it again. Jack, at first, was merely annoyed, but by the fourth time he felt like this person was looking for trouble so he swung around announcing, "That's it dumbass, it is on!"
Turns out the person behind Jack was a 57 year old, blind mother of six, she had never attended a game before because her family hadn't had the money. Her husband and father of all six children had died in the same accident that left her blind. While raising all six kids, on her own, she sacrificed everything to make sure they had every opportunity in the world. She had always loved basketball, but never had the money to go to a game. She was at this game only because her three youngest had sold lemonade for two months to buy her the single ticket. So when Jack spun around, fists in the air, he found himself staring at a woman who had no idea what was happening and a group of horrified people around him. Jack coughed uncomfortably, "The game, I mean, the game is almost on...." But everyone knew what happened. Jack never did use "it's on" again for fear of making another embarrassing mistake.
Ok Loyal Listener, hope that helps. Of course we're always ready here at the magazine to answer any and all questions you may have. Email us at cmagazineblog@yahoo.com.
Recently I was watching a popular cable show and heard a term that sparked my interest. I was wondering if you and your staff could explain the term "It's on!", as in " Alright bitch! You done it, now IT's ON". I'm not quite sure what "It" is or when "it's" "on". Could you please help, I don't want to make a fool out of myself when talking to the ladies.
Thanks -your loyal reader
Dear Your Loyal Reader,
This is an incredibly complex question, one that has literally been asked for centuries. The first recorded instance of "it" being "o"n was around 146 B.C.. Carthage and Rome had been battling for control of part of Sicily and later much of Northern Africa. After the first two Punic Wars, the second of which was almost won by Carthage General Hannibal, the Romans were so incensed that this little African city-state was still standing that the current Roman leader exclaimed to his generals... "Dammit, this sh*t is on!" The Romans proceeded to lay Carthage to the ground in the third and final Punic War.
Clearly in that instance, the term "it" was a part of a greater word "sh*t". The term itself has come to mean the moment at which a particular event has reached its peak or point of no return. Other famous examples are in 1218 when the Uzbeks of Central Asia sent Genghis Khan a letter insinuating that his conquest of China was a pansy-ass move. According to The Secret History of the Mongols, he responded by saying, "Uzbeks my ass, it's on!" He then proceeded to sweep across Central Asia and into the Middle East and Russia, establishing one of the largest empires the world has ever seen.
A more recent example of the term being used was during the American Revolution. John Paul Jones, the famous American captain was on his ship, the Bonhomme Richard and engaged the superior English vessel Serapis. The Richard was badly damaged and the English captain asked Jones if he was ready to give up to which Jones replied, "Bite me bitch, now it's on!" The Americans rallied around those words, the English later surrendered and Jones took the Serapis.
As to the second part of your question, when is "it" "on". The truth is that varies quite a bit depending on the situation. It is always that peak or point of no return, but determining exactly when that moment is takes a skilled expert. I would advise not declaring anything to be "on" unless you are 100% sure that is the case. Here's an example of what could happen if you misjudge is situation.
Jack Watson was waiting in line at a concession stand at a professional basketball game. Four times the person in back of him bumped into him, each time the person apologized and then did it again. Jack, at first, was merely annoyed, but by the fourth time he felt like this person was looking for trouble so he swung around announcing, "That's it dumbass, it is on!"
Turns out the person behind Jack was a 57 year old, blind mother of six, she had never attended a game before because her family hadn't had the money. Her husband and father of all six children had died in the same accident that left her blind. While raising all six kids, on her own, she sacrificed everything to make sure they had every opportunity in the world. She had always loved basketball, but never had the money to go to a game. She was at this game only because her three youngest had sold lemonade for two months to buy her the single ticket. So when Jack spun around, fists in the air, he found himself staring at a woman who had no idea what was happening and a group of horrified people around him. Jack coughed uncomfortably, "The game, I mean, the game is almost on...." But everyone knew what happened. Jack never did use "it's on" again for fear of making another embarrassing mistake.
Ok Loyal Listener, hope that helps. Of course we're always ready here at the magazine to answer any and all questions you may have. Email us at cmagazineblog@yahoo.com.
